Classifieds
Myanma Timber male elephant for sale. Responds to trumpeting and when in the mood, to Princess. Strong, with tusks removed. Only 16 years old (average lifespan is 42). Price on request.
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iPhone 10 in mint condition. Adapter and USB cable available too (extra). Epic antique value. 70,000 Gosicoins. Cost negotiable.
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Second hand recreational hovercraft. Used for one year only. TransAtlantic Inc. logo on the side will have to be changed at the buyer’s expense. Charge: 300,000 Gosicoins.
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LIMITED OFFER!!
30% off on 1 storey/2 storey/penthouse flats near the Floating Rocks, only this festive season. Offer valid only till the Alina festival. HURRY! T&C |
SPECIAL MUSIC FESTIVAL OFFER!
Buy rare, vintage zebra print surf board with lasers and water-proof sound system with enhanced bass at 35% off! Contact: 0203-567893425 |
Laptop on sale! 1st time ever offered! Buy a not-much-used laptop at throw away price. Contact - 9856742584 at the earliest!
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Are you looking for a necklace to gift your girlfriend this New Year? The necklace is exclusively made up of gosic metal which is found exclusively on this island and is excavated from the pious volcano. You can click on the following link or call on the given number to book your order.
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50 percent off on all the Surf’s board at the Shady Surf Stall, only this festive season! The surf boards can be customised according to the buyer's preference!
Contact - [email protected] Hurry! Terms and conditions apply. |
Inkpot Tattoos. 25% off on your first tattoo. Please the gods with specialized fire-water tattoos.
Contact- 3212394394 |
Matrimonials
Well established Umi family seek suitable alliance for their son. 32 years, 180 cm, handsome, vocationally trained in scientific thinking. Sexually unfit due to stress in previous divorce but is curable. Parents of educated, fair, pure Umi, vegetarian, and divorcee women please contact on 9089789849 or write to [email protected]
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Groom wanted for pure Hafian girl, July 2025/5'7", well educated, working as scuba diving instructor. Should have 2 storeyed house, design thinker, animal loving, non zebra eater, 26-35 years of age. Only Hafian divorcees and widowers may apply.
Email:[email protected] |
Bride wanted for 6’2” Hafian boy, November 2032, well educated, Gosico trader. Should be pure native girl with skills in critical thinking, teetotaler; zebra eater is a must, 20-22 years of age. Only pure Kahinpur native girls may apply; widowers no bar.
Email: [email protected] |
Homosexual female required to complete transgender and male couple. Must be short, but not fat.
Religion: Atheist (preferred). Dowry unnecessary. |
Transgender required to complete male and female pair. Age between 60 - 80. Must not be afraid of monkeys.
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Bride wanted for a pure Hafian boy, July 2025/ 5’2”, well educated, music festival organizer. Should have an apartment, enjoys finer things in life, non-turtle eater, 22-28 years of age.
Email: [email protected] |
Groom wanted! Want a well educated, qualified and cultured boy. Should be conversant with PeePee. He need not have good salary, but should be understanding and be ready to do what wife says.
Contact 9856742584 or email [email protected] |
Three males needed for nymphomaniac girl. The household follows a ‘No Pants’ rule. Those with erectile dysfunction and/or premature ejaculation please avoid. Blacks only.
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Bride wanted by a well educated Hafian man and trans pair. Needs to be at least 5’5 feet tall, Age: 25-30. Should be well spoken and enjoy travelling. Inhabitance: No bar.
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